Now Come On

How weird (…crazy?) is it that the last post I wrote before flying into the cuckoo’s nest was about the Psych Museum?  It was over a month before and, no, it wasn’t planned.  If someone had told me in March that I’d be in inpatient treatment end of April, I would’ve been taken aback but I can’t say surprised.

It’s been a rough couple of years.

I love how the euphemisms for mental health treatment have changed.  Depending on what era I pick, I like to say either “I went to the country for some rest,” or “I went mad,” or “I was locked away in a sanitarium,” or “I had a nervous breakdown,” or “I went to rehab.”

One counselor, alluding to the fact that active addicts end up incarcerated, institutionalized, or dead, periodically would say to us:  “Welcome to the institution!”

My favorite is what I heard my ex-boss said about me:  “She’s delicate.”  I just think it sounds cute, but frankly, it was accurate.

Remember the schizophrenic’s embroidery project from the museum?  Little Miss “Love Me I Am Crazy?”

There was also “Wait for me I am lonely.”  And “Hair on fire.”  And “Because you mine and I saw you in the purse house.”

Then this:

I can relate to that.  Really all of them.  And I rather liked being “the sick girl” – delicate… helpless… needy.  It was what I knew.

Doesn’t matter what I’m comfortable with anymore, though, because the pain from that type of comfort became greater than the pain of change.  Whoo boy do I plan to keep changing.  Then one day I’ll embroider a phrase for myself:  The Strong Girl.  Fool.

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Categories: HA! | 1 Comment

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One thought on “Now Come On

  1. Spyder

    You are a strong girl. Fool… well sometimes, but then most of us are at one time another.

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